Friday, January 21, 2005
Vomiting sucks. Understatement.
Don't ever mix salmon with a French vanilla protein shake. Duh. I was not as smart, as most everyone who has a brain would be, when I saw that combination. I figured protein is good for you and salmon is good for you...Genius!! I thought I had a superstar diet plan, that Britney Spears would envy, right on my snowman placemat. I was evidently wrong.
I ate this meal before I headed off to my sandwich artistry job. I felt perfectly perfect at work. Did my job, stressed out, had a normal day. I fell on my ass in the snow, near a dumpster, later that night. Other then that it was a decent day/night. As soon as I got in the car to head home I felt like I was going to die. I got home, shat my brains out on the toilet, and then proceeded to fall onto my bed. I seriously thought my number was up. I was dead. I woke up a while later to find myself running to the toilet yet again. Another mudslide fest. GREAT! I could not wait to see what the rest of the night brought me.
I puked. Theres nothing to say about how I puked, because you just puke. End. Right? Wrong. I shat out some liquid chocolate, cleaned myself off and pulled up my drawers. I sat on the bathroom floor wishing death upon myself. I lean towards the toilet "just in case" I had to vomit. Usually in the event of not feeling well, i.e stomach problems and the likes, I can usually walk away scott free of spewage. I was almost at that point until I discovered a pubic hair on the edge of the toilet. Now I know it wasnt mine, because I keep mine military. I lost it. Fucking 8 meals came out of my gut along with the forementioned fish and protein shake. Ill tell ya...I felt like a million dollars after that bile and processed food officially came out. I felt like eating a basket of cheeseburgers. I walk into my room and mention it to my friend Emily and my sister. Almost instantly they both backed up a few inches and covered their facial regions. C'mon girls, its just a contagious bug...nothing harmful. They were like "Ewwww, go away". My friend telling me to go away in my own room. I stayed, because it was my fucking room. Its not like you want to go sit in the kitchen after you puke. You want your comfy bed, or a possible barrel gun. So after feeling as if I just gave birth to a brand new baby boy I layed in my bed for a while and felt better.
It didnt end there.
About 8 shits later, another puke session and 5 more shits I can finally say I am better. I havent shit yet today, so if its liquid later tonight I think I may come through with that barrel gun.
Nighty night children of my soul.
Don't ever mix salmon with a French vanilla protein shake. Duh. I was not as smart, as most everyone who has a brain would be, when I saw that combination. I figured protein is good for you and salmon is good for you...Genius!! I thought I had a superstar diet plan, that Britney Spears would envy, right on my snowman placemat. I was evidently wrong.
I ate this meal before I headed off to my sandwich artistry job. I felt perfectly perfect at work. Did my job, stressed out, had a normal day. I fell on my ass in the snow, near a dumpster, later that night. Other then that it was a decent day/night. As soon as I got in the car to head home I felt like I was going to die. I got home, shat my brains out on the toilet, and then proceeded to fall onto my bed. I seriously thought my number was up. I was dead. I woke up a while later to find myself running to the toilet yet again. Another mudslide fest. GREAT! I could not wait to see what the rest of the night brought me.
I puked. Theres nothing to say about how I puked, because you just puke. End. Right? Wrong. I shat out some liquid chocolate, cleaned myself off and pulled up my drawers. I sat on the bathroom floor wishing death upon myself. I lean towards the toilet "just in case" I had to vomit. Usually in the event of not feeling well, i.e stomach problems and the likes, I can usually walk away scott free of spewage. I was almost at that point until I discovered a pubic hair on the edge of the toilet. Now I know it wasnt mine, because I keep mine military. I lost it. Fucking 8 meals came out of my gut along with the forementioned fish and protein shake. Ill tell ya...I felt like a million dollars after that bile and processed food officially came out. I felt like eating a basket of cheeseburgers. I walk into my room and mention it to my friend Emily and my sister. Almost instantly they both backed up a few inches and covered their facial regions. C'mon girls, its just a contagious bug...nothing harmful. They were like "Ewwww, go away". My friend telling me to go away in my own room. I stayed, because it was my fucking room. Its not like you want to go sit in the kitchen after you puke. You want your comfy bed, or a possible barrel gun. So after feeling as if I just gave birth to a brand new baby boy I layed in my bed for a while and felt better.
It didnt end there.
About 8 shits later, another puke session and 5 more shits I can finally say I am better. I havent shit yet today, so if its liquid later tonight I think I may come through with that barrel gun.
Nighty night children of my soul.
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
Whhhhewwwww! Holidays are pretty much over. Closed. Done for. Thank GOD! I love the holidays. I am a "holiday junky" so to speak. Dont know why, it just gets me in a good cheery mood I guess.
Anyhoo...I am glad its over, because now I can really start saving money and getting ready for an awesome summer. The plan is to save up enough money to move to California. Beginning of plan and end of plan. If the plan works I myself will be surprised. Im so ready to get on with it. Sick and tired of lame ass Connecticut. Need to get away. Yes I will miss my family. No it wont be easy, but who said it would? I am in the state of mind where I just want out. I want to get on with my life. My life. Selfish? Absolutely. I know what I want to do with my life, but if I tell people they look at me and think 'Thats a long shot' or 'thats knew' in a sarcastic tone. Those are the two reasons why I just dont tell anyone. Who made the law that anyone should know, except me? Uh, no one. For now if I recieve the question, "What do you wanna do?" I say "Not sure yet, maybe Ill go to college" HA! So far from what I want to do.
What do you want to do, Leah? I want to be a performer. Singing, basically. Thats right, who doesnt? Its not a joke though...I honestly do. There is no other "job" like it, and it would be something I enjoy fully. Acting is another interest that I would love to experiment with. I also would love to open up my own restaurant and create a really cool atmosphere for people to go to. Can I take control of all three ideas and let them become a reality? Yes. I plan on it. Dont get me wrong, when I say "I want to be a performer" or "I want to open my own restaurant" I am not speaking of the celebrity aspect of it. I couldn't care less if I became "famous" or known as an artist or buisness women. I just want to do what I like. If people seem to like what I do as much as me then so be it. If not, thats perfectly fine....because Im gonna do it anyway. I just have to get cracking on my ideas so one day they WILL become a reality. Time and persistance will show true. I dream.
So the plan is hopefully in gear.
Side Note: Whilst driving through the mall parking lot, on a christmas shopping day, I witnessed something hilarious and horrific. I saw a man open up his trunk. Harmless. Another man proceeded to climb out of the trunk like nothing happened...Like he didnt just get out of a trunk. My sister and I didnt know what to do. Laugh? Call police? We laughed in shock and proceeded with the day. It didnt look weird. Yes, a man getting out of another mans trunk seems perfectly strange, but it didnt look strange. He didnt look harmed, and there was no sign of struggle. We drove away. The parking lot was packed so I am sure other people saw it. If not, I hope that man is alright and Id like to thank him for all the great laughs I endured.
Side Note 2: Drinking 18 shots on New Years Eve doesnt seem too off the hook. Only when your sister tells you you drank 18 shots, and you only remember doing about 8. Yeah, new years rocked.
So Happy New Year, I hope everyone figures out what they want in life. I hope you have a great year, not wasted....in more ways then one. I hope everyone finds what they are so desperately looking for. I hope my boss hires more people so I dont have to work everyday of the week. Thank you and Goodnight. Morning?
Anyhoo...I am glad its over, because now I can really start saving money and getting ready for an awesome summer. The plan is to save up enough money to move to California. Beginning of plan and end of plan. If the plan works I myself will be surprised. Im so ready to get on with it. Sick and tired of lame ass Connecticut. Need to get away. Yes I will miss my family. No it wont be easy, but who said it would? I am in the state of mind where I just want out. I want to get on with my life. My life. Selfish? Absolutely. I know what I want to do with my life, but if I tell people they look at me and think 'Thats a long shot' or 'thats knew' in a sarcastic tone. Those are the two reasons why I just dont tell anyone. Who made the law that anyone should know, except me? Uh, no one. For now if I recieve the question, "What do you wanna do?" I say "Not sure yet, maybe Ill go to college" HA! So far from what I want to do.
What do you want to do, Leah? I want to be a performer. Singing, basically. Thats right, who doesnt? Its not a joke though...I honestly do. There is no other "job" like it, and it would be something I enjoy fully. Acting is another interest that I would love to experiment with. I also would love to open up my own restaurant and create a really cool atmosphere for people to go to. Can I take control of all three ideas and let them become a reality? Yes. I plan on it. Dont get me wrong, when I say "I want to be a performer" or "I want to open my own restaurant" I am not speaking of the celebrity aspect of it. I couldn't care less if I became "famous" or known as an artist or buisness women. I just want to do what I like. If people seem to like what I do as much as me then so be it. If not, thats perfectly fine....because Im gonna do it anyway. I just have to get cracking on my ideas so one day they WILL become a reality. Time and persistance will show true. I dream.
So the plan is hopefully in gear.
Side Note: Whilst driving through the mall parking lot, on a christmas shopping day, I witnessed something hilarious and horrific. I saw a man open up his trunk. Harmless. Another man proceeded to climb out of the trunk like nothing happened...Like he didnt just get out of a trunk. My sister and I didnt know what to do. Laugh? Call police? We laughed in shock and proceeded with the day. It didnt look weird. Yes, a man getting out of another mans trunk seems perfectly strange, but it didnt look strange. He didnt look harmed, and there was no sign of struggle. We drove away. The parking lot was packed so I am sure other people saw it. If not, I hope that man is alright and Id like to thank him for all the great laughs I endured.
Side Note 2: Drinking 18 shots on New Years Eve doesnt seem too off the hook. Only when your sister tells you you drank 18 shots, and you only remember doing about 8. Yeah, new years rocked.
So Happy New Year, I hope everyone figures out what they want in life. I hope you have a great year, not wasted....in more ways then one. I hope everyone finds what they are so desperately looking for. I hope my boss hires more people so I dont have to work everyday of the week. Thank you and Goodnight. Morning?
